Today is a big day for me, I mean a really really really big day for me. To day I was told the follow:
“You have potential, you are not a fraud.”
Of course a little backstory is required here. For the past nearly 9 years I have been on a path of recovery from childhood to early adulthood trauma and and sexual abuse. This journey has been tough and long and it’s far from over, but it has evolved! Instead of learning to cope with the impact of the trauma, I have graduated recently to growing from it. Which for me means creating independence a life on my terms and the big one for me, No More Hiding! Yes, my big coping mechanism has been hiding from people, and it’s really not helpful when your trying to build things for people. All of this backstory leads us to this; I was never told ever in my life that I had potential, I always felt small, insignificant, and simply worthless regardless of the facts. But that changed today!
Having heard and explained and told those magical word, “you have potential”, my view on myself is different. I’m free from myself! Does this mean negative thoughts will stop, of course not, but I have broken a cage that I have been in all my life, and that a huge massive thanks to Charles and the tens of people who have popped in and out of my life to keep me going.
I am still digesting this new sense of wonder, freedom, and possibility, it’s really foreign to me as i have never been her before. So that’s okay! I have written a beautiful piece in my morning pages and shared it with you guys on my YouTube channel, it really is beautiful and worth the time to check it out. I have also recorded an intro video for my YouTube channel, something I have been stuck on feeling not good enough, so I never did it. The last thing I want to accomplish today is starting on my Everydays project inspired by Beeple.
It feels great who knew just a few words could be life altering! So for you if you are feeling like a fraud, don’t! This discomfort is simply you exploring your potential. By definition as long as you are not trying to cheat or deceive anyone you are not fraud! Remember that if it’s the only thing you take from this, remember that you are exploring your potential and there is nothing fraudulent about that.